Church Confessions
by Mujyakina-Hitokoroshiya
Summary: Both Weiss and Schwartz have gone to church to confess their sins...but which ones?


Disclaimers: I don't own Weiss or any of the characters mentioned.

Warnings: Yaoi, references to God, OOC and swearing.

Notes: Muahahaha! I once again do another stupid fic! My insperation for this fic was when my cousin told me about her going to a retreat. Please don't flame my fic TT.

"Blah Blah"

'Thoughts'

Telepathy

Both Weiss and Schwarz are on a retreat and have to now make a confession.

Priest: Now that we are all gathered here, who will go in for the confession first?

All except Aya: Step back

Aya enters the confession room.

Aya: Forgive my father for I have sinned.

Priest: Tell me my child, what you have done.

Aya: Well…thinks 'I can't tell him what I really do…' I've been glaring at people and give death threats to all those girls who don't buy anything at the flower shop.

Priest: sweat drops Very well my child. Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.

The next to enter was Youji.

Youji: Forgive me Father for I have sinned.

Priest: Tell me my child, what sin have you done.

Youji: Well you see, I've been womanizing for most of my life and I don't really feel like stopping now. So yeah, I haven't done much.

Priest: Um…okay, go now in peace.

Ken soon entered the confession room.

Ken: Forgive me Father for I have sinned.

Priest: 'At last we have a sensible one' tell me child, what sin have you committed?

Ken: Well you see…hits random object I can't take this shit anymore! Brazil keeps winning each fucking year at soccer and Japan hasn't got any fucking chance against them! I could be out there playing but NOOOOO, I had to get kicked off the fucking J-league! I had some fucked-up friend to drug me!

Priest: OO;

Ken: Oh…um…I've been cursing a lot…;

Priest: Err…go in peace and try not to curse a lot. OO

When Ken left the room Omi came in. He was crying.

Omi: Father sniff Forgive me sniff for I have sinned.

Priest: 'I wonder what he did…' Tell me my child, what have you done wrong.

Omi: Sniff Okay…but you have to promise that you won't call the police…

Priest: Holds cordless phone in hand and starts dialing to the police I won't just tell me what you've done.

Omi: Sniff It's so horrible! I can't believe I did it! I did to my best friend!

Priest: Tell me, what have you done?

Omi: I…I…I told I lie! I lied to my friend that my favorite color was purple! It's actually pink!

Police: barges into confession room what's the problem sir?

Omi: starts to cry again Father! You promised not to call the police!

Priest: Um…they're not the police! Thinks of something they're the…ah…they're strippers! That's it! Strippers!

Police: Oo A married police man faints others start to shift away the rest run away

Omi: Father! This is a church! How could you do such a thing?? And to think you're a priest!

Outside the confession room

Schuldich: Mien Got! Who called the police?

Youji: Who do you think?

Ken: Um…the priest?

Aya: smacks Ken's head

Crawford: One point to the cursing jock.

Farfarello: Hehehe…Cursing hurts God.

Omi emerges from the Confession room

Youji: Omi, what did you say to make the priest call the police?

Omi: Um…not to call the police?

Aya: Hn…

Schu: So kitten, why exactly did the police run away?

Omi: blush well you see…the priest said that they were strippers and that's when they ran away.

Crawford: I guess I'm next…

In the Confession room

Crawford: Forgive me Father for I am about to sin in 5 hours 53 minutes and 30 seconds.

Priest: sweat drops Okay…tell me my child what sin will you do?

Crawford: I'll be doing my job and I won't be too clean about my job.

Priest: Um…Go in peace and try to do right not wrong.

Schu entered next.

Schu: Forgive me Father…and you know the rest…

Priest: Tell me what wrong have you done?

Schu: Reads a few minds, including priest's Um…been looking through stuff I shouldn't go through…don't know if it's a sin though…

Priest: Go in piece your God has saved you.

Nagi entered the room after Schu.

Nagi: Forgive me Father for I have sinned.

Priest: 'Lord, I hope he isn't like the young blond.' Tell me child what sin have you done?

Nagi: I've disobeyed my "Parents" and went to the person I love. Oh, the one I love is actually a boy, you would have seen him. He's the blond boy who came in crying. Yeah well, when I disobeyed my parents I went to my boyfriend and spent a hot steamy night of…

Priest: God has forgiven you, go in piece.

Farf was the last to go in, wearing a straight jacket.

Farf: laughing

Priest: Um…what have you done child?

Farf: Why would I ask for forgiveness? God's the one who took my family! laughs madly God needs to feel the pain! starts to attack the priest

Priest: HEEEELP!

Weiss& Schwartz: Go in and saves priest

Youji: Who let him come?

Schu: Shrugs Felt like bringing him. I mean, How come we have to suffer while he lounges off?

Youji: Point taken.

The rest of the day was spent trying to pry Farfarello from killing the Priest.


End file.
